True story: while I was planning my wedding, my great grandmother asked me if I was having a wedding or a bazaar. Here is the thing, you are going to offend someone with your wedding. Even if you are having the most ‘traditional’ wedding possible and minding all of your p’s and q’s, someone is going to get offended that you did not invite them to your wedding, even though you have not talked for 5 years. Or you may just have a great grandmother that always speaks her mind. Whatever the case, here is how you can deal with the negative comments and keep it posi(tive) for your wedding.
Don’t Feed The Trolls
Ok, now I feel weird implying that my great grandmother is a troll… But this phrase just works so well! If someone is providing criticism just to do it, not because they want to help you, just brush it off. I know, easier said than done. If someone makes a comment online, guess what, you don’t have to respond! If someone makes a comment in person, respond, but do not engage them. Like Elsa, let it go. “Hahaha. It is a wedding, just with some fun.”
If you need to, avoid the topic of the wedding with those people. If they bring up the wedding, gracefully change the topic of conversation. You know how you and your best friend can start talking about where to go for lunch and all of a sudden you realize 30 minutes has passed and you are now talking about Theodore Roosevelt? (Hopefully this is not just me.) Channel that and change the topic of the conversation.
“You know who had a beautiful wedding dress? Kate Middleton. I wonder if they served tea and biscuits at their wedding. I love earl grey tea! What is your favorite?”
Know Your Supporters
You are going to have people that support your wedding no matter what. Focus on those people. Surround yourself with those people. Supporters can often be found in your spouse, your maid of honor or best man, other members of the wedding party, and friends who have gotten married recently. Use these people to reassure you that you are not crazy for having both of your parents walk you down the aisle or for having your friend officiate the wedding.
Vent It Out
Sometimes, you just need to vent about the haters. Ask one of your supporters if you can go out to coffee or froyo so that you can vent about the wedding. Vent and let it out, but don’t let the whole conversation be a bitch fest. Try to laugh about the haters. Once you are finished, talk about the things that are going right with your wedding. End on a positive note.
Stay Posi
Short for Stay Positive. Keep your head up. Your wedding will come and go, and everyone will have a great time, and the haters will be nowhere to be found (because they will be overwhelmed with joy for you). Or at least they will be keeping their mouth shut and secretly thinking their judgmental thought in their head. But who cares?! Because you just got married and nothing else matters!
