My dear husband has a physical job (he is a roofer) and physical hobbies (being an outdoorsmen and gym rat). Honestly, I don’t remember the last time he did not have muscle soreness of some sort. Me? I hold a lot of tension in my shoulders. So we are always asking each other to rub our shoulders, backs, and feet while we are watching TV in the evening. But it is really special when we take time out to dedicate to massaging each other. Here are some tips for your own massage night.
Set the Mood
This can take many forms. Maybe you dim the lights and play some spa music (there is a Pandora station for that). Or maybe you put a comedy on the TV. Or maybe you light some candles and put on some 90’s R&B. (Oh la la.)
Use Massage Oil
I cannot express how much easier it is to massage someone using the massage oil! It removes the friction between your hands and their body, which makes your muscles fatigue less which makes it easier for you to massage for longer. You can buy massage oils anywhere from Bath and Body to Etsy. I prefer to make my own with essential oils I have in the house. We use a mix of eucalyptus, rosemary, and peppermint oil mixed in a jojoba oil base.
Take Turns
It is only fair that you take turns massaging each other! I like to set a timer when we do this. It makes sure that everything is fair. Because when you are giving the massage, time seem to creep by, but when you receive the massage, time flies by like a 747. If you are new to this, start with 10 – 15 minutes. If you are a pro and have some time, do 20 – 30 minute massages.
Decide who wants to go first. My husband and I usually to take turns with who goes first. But if you want your spouse to rub your legs, and their shoulders hurt, it would be nice for you to go first, as you won’t be straining your legs giving a massage.
Ask Each Other Where to Massage
Let’s keep it PG, at least for now. If massaging each other leads to other things, so be it, but be fair and make sure both of you get a nice massage. 🙂
Do you hold tension in your shoulders? Do you have a knot that has been particularly nasty lately? Maybe you were on your feet for a long time that day and really just want your feet massaged. Make sure your spouse knows exactly where you want them to focus, this will help make sure you feel satisfied after the massage.
Step Up Your Game
We massage each other so much that last year I bought my husband a massage chair for Christmas. We both LOVE it! If you are not quite ready for the commitment, watch some YouTube videos on how to give excellent massages!
Married With Children
You can always have you kids help! I remember walking on peoples backs when I was a child to massage/pop them. You may not want your kids walking on your back (I may have fallen a few times), but you can have them give a foot massage while you give a shoulder massage. Or maybe they can massage the dog or one of their stuffed animals while you massage each other.
Or if you are in a candles and 90s R&B mood, you can always do your massages after they go to bed for the night.
Want more date night ideas? Check out my #DateYourSpouse series.
